


Dreams in Which I'm Dying

by Villinye (AslansCompass)



Series: Kairos' Song [3]
Category: Doctor Who
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-15
Updated: 2014-02-15
Packaged: 2018-01-12 14:16:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1188309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AslansCompass/pseuds/Villinye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by ladysolique2's amazing video to Gary Jules's song "Mad World."  A one-shot set after Journey's End</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dreams in Which I'm Dying

 

It was never supposed to end this way." He reaches over and holds Rose's hand, feeling every bone under the loose skin. "All those times you worried about being left without me. But I never thought this would happen."

She manages a weak smile, but her reply is lost to the sound of the monitors.

"All the adventures we had–the fifteenth New York, World War Two, eighteenth century France, werewolves, Daleks: remember the Daleks? You destroyed their emperor, Rose; did I ever tell you how amazing that was? You were amazing. Fantastic."

"Doctor," she whispers. "My Doctor."

"I'm here, Rose." He reaches into his pocket and offers her the sonic screwdriver his other self had left him that day on the beach. "Take it." He presses it into her hand, wrapping his fingers around it.

She tries to speak, but only a faint crackling comes out. He presses his head against hers–his psychic powers aren't as strong as a Time Lord's, but he can hear her perfectly. I love you, Rose.

 _I love you_. She says his name, the name he never thought he'd tell another person. Images pour through her head, the last hints of the Time Vortex that had once filled her mind.

Then there is nothing.

Rose? Rose! Cold fury fills his limbs. He thought he'd known despair before, but not like this. He isn't the Doctor–maybe the Doctor could have saved her. But he is merely human. And Rose was now another statistic, part of the list of cancer deaths for 2032. Tears press against his throat.

Someone knocks on the door. "Tell us if you need anything."

"Yes…of course." He slumps back in the rickety hospital chair and closes his eyes. Time slips away as he falls into dreams. Dreams of all the adventures they'd had, and more they'd never have, trips he'd been saving for a special occasion.

"Living your life day after day, the one adventure I can never have." All the ways people died roll through his mind, yet they do not fill him with fear. One life to live…but without Rose, he doesn't want to. Even in his dreams, he can see the peace on her face.

Half of a Time Lord's fear of death is caused by the personality changes regeneration brings. But even as human, he had held onto that fear. But as that fear dies, it is not replaced by a human terror, but with understanding.

Humans speak of death as peaceful, and for the first time, he understands why.


End file.
